Something strange is afoot at the Circle K

Jenn and I don't find ourselves at Circle K very often. I'm not sure if there aren't that many of them around, or if we just tend not to frequent them in favor of the more familiar convenience store like Speedway or BP... In any case, when we do find ourselves getting gas or pit stopping at a Circle K, I always smile to myself as I recall Bill and Ted pacing in the parking lot and coming to the realization that "something strange is afoot at the Circle K"

Blogged from my iPhone.

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Edit : We happened to be at that same Circle K a mere three days after our visit which prompted this blog entry... I got a better photo this time, so I'm replacing the bad one, with the better one.

Meltdown

so yesterday I had a meltdown...

First things first... I don't melt down. I do not stress, I work well under pressure, I am a control freak (to the extent that it is possible in any given situation)... and even when any of the above isn't true I pretty much don't let it get to me.

Second things second.... Obviously this is all hogwash (link provided for all of you not up on your redneck terminology). To the best of my knowledge everyone has stress. Most people worry about at least one thing, and some people worry about everything. The trick to not melting down, is that people find things to do with the stress... Some people run, some people fish, or take pictures, or punch things, or cry, or drink, or fly kites, or take walks, or go on a silent retreat, or something...

and then some people just bottle things up inside, they supress the urge to let it out, thinking that it will show weakness, or character flaws, or that someone might call them a pansy, or some other reason... and then, eventually there is no where left to store it all up, and they meltdown.

I'm one of those people.

Typically I can detect when a meltdown is approaching and take some action to hold it off, or find a way to release some of the pent-up stress so that the meltdown is less painful, and less draining. I do one of those things I mentioned above (walk,fish, getaway,etc) and things go back to bearable, and life goes on...

I won't bore you with the details of what's going on, or what got me to the general state of stress I was in on Sunday morning because it would... well... bore you.

But anyhoo.... Sunday morning, in the midst of amazing worship ( thanks Marty & gang ) and an equally amazing message from Steven, I melted. I hope that I melted quietly. I am allowing myself to believe that only one other person noticed, because then I'll be less worried about the fact that I melted in public.

The meltdown, thankfully, was short and was followed by an awesome afternoon ( see here and here and here ) with the RVCC Youth out at Chris & Tesa's place. What an amazing group of kids ( and adults ). What an awesome blessing to be part of this exciting ministry.

But anyhoo... That was yesterday, and now I am back to real life where melting down is not permitted.

Ah well....

Eight things...

Tersie tagged me on this one, and even tho my inner procrastinator wants to put it off until later, I'm putting together my eight things...

Oh... and Tersie, this one was far too interesting to stick on the other blog.
Thanks for tagging me.

The rules are simple…Each player lists 8 facts/habits about themselves. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning before those facts/habits are listed. At the end of the post, the player then tags 8 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

Number 1.

I am obsessed with ink pens. You may already know this from a previous post... It's true though... I probably have fifty different pens on my desk right now, all of which write slightly differently... some of which are so nice to write with that I waste most of the ink just doodling with them, and some which are so terrible that I can't stand to pick them up. For me it isn't just about the way the pen writes either... it is about how it feels in your hand, how much it weighs, the balance as I lean it over my index finger and place the tip to the medium... This ink pen obsession is weird for me because I rarely have the occasion to write anything long hand...

Number 2.

Jenn worries about everything... In order to compensate for this, I do not.

This isn't the kind of not worrying that Jaki seems to be blessed with. I actually worry and carry stress around for almost every aspect of my life... I am a perfectionist, a workaholic, and an over achiever... I truly believe that my worst critic is myself, and most of the time it eats me alive... BUT, I know that Jenn wouldn't be able to cope at all if I let on that I was stressed over everything, so I nearly always squelch the anxiety with will power and assure myself and those around me that things are going to work out ok in the end... ( The fact that everything generally turns out ok in the end is, of course, not a coincidence... but that's another story ).


Number 3.

I have sleep apnea. I realize that everyone who has had the misfortune of sleeping with me or near me in the past 10 years or so already knew this... For anyone who didn't know though, this basically means that when I'm asleep I stop breathing, and then snore, snort, and make other horrific noises when my brain realizes that there is no O2 getting up there... To compensate for my sleep apnea, I wear a CPAP machine to sleep at night. It is basically a little box that blows air up my nose to keep all the pipes and stuff open. It is pretty small and unobtrusive, so I take it everywhere that I go that I might sleep even when I travel overnight somewhere. It was a little tough getting used to when I first got it, but after five years I hardly notice it anymore... The cool side affect of the cpap machine is that when I'm wearing it, if I open my mouth then the air that is blowing up my nose, just rushes right out... You might not realize why this is cool, until you learn that all I have to do is pucker up and then I can whistle non-stop, without needing to worry about breathing for as long as I an hold a pucker... It makes great Youth group entertainment on mission trips, trust me.

Number 4.

I'm a pack rat. I can't stand to throw things away. Anyone who has ever seen my office, my coffee table, or the inside of my shed can attest to this. I know it drives Jenn crazy, as she is always trying to get rid of my stuff... I attribute my pack-rat-ism partially to the fact that deep down I just can't bear to part with stuff ( see this post ), and partially that I have convinced myself that if I do get rid of something I will need it later... Being a pack rat is one of those annoying habits that I would love to kick, but am not sure how to start...

Number 5.

I have hair issues.

I hate the hair on top of my head. When I let it grow out it is thick. I don't just mean thick like it is full, or anything like that. I'm talking shag carpet meets wire brush thick. It can't be combed, styled, or tamed... So I shave it off... I prefer it shaved right to the skin, shiny and squeaky. It grows so fast that I can go from being shaved squeaky clean to an unmanageable mane in about three weeks.

In contrast to the hair upstairs, I seem to be follicularly challenged in my facial region. I would love to grow a big bushy mustache and a crowder goatee, but try as I might I get nothing greater than fuzz from the temples down.

See... hair issues... *sigh

Number 6.

For almost two years, while I was in college, I drank an average of two and-a-half pots of coffee per day. Maxwell house. I had a coffee maker next to my bed in my dorm room, which I would put the water and coffee in before I went to sleep. I had a big insulated coffee mug, which would hold half of the pot in one cup. When my alarm went off, I would reach out and smack the Snooze button, and the coffee switch in one swift motion and go back to sleep for nine minutes. When the alarm went off again I would sit up, pour the first cup, and drink it before I got up. Then I would empty the pot into my second cup-full, make another pot and take that cup to the shower with me. Post-shower I took another cup to my first class, and stopped in my room for the fourth cup-of-the-day between my first and second classes.

Typically I would drink either half-a-pot or a whole pot in the evening while doing homework or sitting around. Even though I was buying the coffee, it was too much of a hassle and I was too poor to waste money and effort on cream and sugar so I drank it black.

I'm better now... One to two cups per day with cream typically satisfies me.

Number 7.

I love to read. My favorite book of all time is The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy trilogy by Douglas Adams. I read the five part trilogy for the first time while I was in high school, and have probably read the series hundreds of times since then. I make Hitchhiker references multiple times daily in my normal conversations, but it is only rarely that someone catches or acknowledges the reference. Most of the time I just get looked at like I'm strange.

Number 8.

I was running out of steam, and Jenn told me I should include this last one so here you go...

I love to cook. My specialties are home made fettuccine alfredo, all kids of breakfast stuff, chilli, and random other things. When I was in college ( back in the coffee-swilling days ) I devised a scad of different ways to cook things in the dorm ( where most cooking apparatus wasn't permitted ). Especially during my senior year, when my dorm room had a large living room, I would cook huge meals in my room and invite the whole floor down to eat and hang out. I also love to cook for guests or friends as part of evening entertainment.


Well, that's it... If you're still reading this far down I hope you found it interesting.

Thanks again to Tersie for tagging me. I would like to tag Marty, Lauren, Jordan, Steven, and anyone else who wants to get on the band wagon.

My other blog...

This post is just in case any of my regular readers haven't stumbled onto my other blog yet...

For anyone who has been wondering if I am just too grouchy, or too much of a stick in the mud to take all those online quiz things... I actually do fill them out most of the time...

However, rather that clutter up my "real" blog, I publish my results to all of that crazy stuff on my other blog... which you can find here.

Random by Roogles

Enjoy the silliness.

Who's idea was IM anyway?

This past week at church, I had the privelege of speaking ot the church about my experience on a silent retreat at the Abbey of Gethsemani this past April. In the course of the message I believe I mentioned that I am a major gadget nerd. I've been meaning to post a blog about my current favorite gadgets, and have had one in my drafts folder for a while, but inner-procrastinator has kept me from ever getting it done.

Anyhoo... I was talking with Tersie on IM today and it occurred to me that I am also an IM geek, and my IM client is just one of the many "gadgets" in my arsenal of geek weaponry!

When I was in high school, I picked up the nick name "Roogles". If you know me at all, you know that "roogles" has followed me through high school, college, into real life, the web, and just about every other aspect of my life. I do own "roogles.com", the whole fam has email addresses @roogles.com ( eli, jenn, ellie, and silas ). And in HS I picked up the name "Roogles" for AOL's Instant messenger...

Ah, my first IM account, and the one that has followed me through out the years. Roogles on AIM is still my most used IM account, and the one that I sign into solely if I don't have a multi IM client handy.

When I got into college I started discovering that all of my new found friends had their own IM accounts on a variety of services ( many already on AIM ) but also on Yahoo, MSN, and rarely on ICQ. Being the easy-going, compliant guy that I am I simply signed up for all the services!

Those were the days too... Having four or five different IM clients, all open at the same time, each with anywhere from a few to a ton of "buddies" on my list. Eventually I discovered Trillian ( yes, I was a PC user at the time ), which allowed me to congregate all of my IM services into one handy app, with a long list of buddies all in one place.

When I started working for Horizon ( in 2000 ), ICQ was the IM of choice for inter-office communication so I became a big ICQ user then ( still have my 8 digit ICQ number ).

Since making the move to a Mac in 2002, I have tried a few different multi-IM clients including Fire, Proteus, and finally settling down with Adium.

I am still an IM service junkie... Right now my Adium is setup for AIM, ICQ, .Mac ( Apple's AIM variant ), two yahoo messenger accounts, msn messenger, Gtalk ( Google's Jabber implementation ), and our corporate ( in office ) jabber system.

A grand total of eight IM accounts on seven different services. I have about 325 total "buddies" on my list, which span across all of those services. I tend to have my IM up anytime that I'm online which is almost all day everyday at work and many evenings at home in my recliner.

If I don't already have you on one of those lists and you want to give me a virtual "what's up", let me know and I'll happily add you.

I'm not really sure if there as a point to any of this... Just thought it might be fun to dust off the old blog editor.

drop me an IM some time to say "Hi".

-Roogles

Hiding behind the wall.

In the spring of 1848 fourty-four trappist monks left the Abbey of Melleray in Western France and traveled on foot, by boat, and later by covered wagon to a small farm outside of Bardstown, Kentucky.

Seven times daily, eight counting mass, the brothers gather and pray the Psalms in unison.

This quote by Father Matthew Kelty (one of the monks at Gethsemani) still gives me chills.

"It's bad enough that we make cheese and fruitcake for the Kingdom of God, we do worse that that. We sing. We've been doing it since we got here. They got here late in the afternoon of December 21, 1848. Next day they began. December the 22, and it's never stopped. Day by day, week by week, year by year, until the end. In a wild, sordid, noisy, violent world we sing."

According to the Rule of St Benedict guest are to welcomed at the Abbey and are to be received "as Christ Himself".

On April 30, 2007 Steve and I made our way to Gethsemani to participate in a one week "Silent Retreat".

This coming Sunday (June 17) I will be sharing about our experience at the Abbey, and the impact that it had on me personally.

The following are some random observations, quotes, and things that I plan to bring up on Sunday...

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"We don't put up walls to keep the people out, we put up the wall to keep the noise out."

-Brother Christian (GuestMaster)

What would be different if I could make regular time for just me and God?

What am I doing to keep the noise level down in my own life?

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The monastic life is made up of three areas
- Prayer
- Work
- Spiritual Reading

If we are to live balanced Christian lives, out here in the real world, how can we expect to do so unless we also have this balance of prayer, "real life", and pursuit of spirituality?

The life of a monk is simply an exaggeration of these three principles, which we all need to keep balanced.

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In her book The Abbey of Gethsemani - Place of Peace and Paradox, Dianne Aprile writes...

"Monks are no better at this process, no better at praying and loving, than other other man or woman. But the monastic life gives them the structure, support, and encouragement to keep it up even when they fail. And they do".

And another quote by Brother Christian...

"We don't just pray when we FEEL like it. It is a constant. We put ourselves in God's presence no matter what we feel like."

A couple of my thoughts...

What would it be like if we, as a community of believers, provided for one another such a structure of support, prayer, encouragement, and love (even when fail, and we will) that we lived in God's presence all of the time whether we feel like being there or not?

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The last couple of things I'm hoping to do on Sunday are (1) dispell some of the myths about what "silent retreat" actually means... I was there with Steve after all... and (2) share some entries from my journal describing how I felt leading up to, during, and near the end of our time at Gethsemani.


I've rambled long enough this morning... If there are any specific questions, thoughts, anything that you would like to know about our time there, please leave comments below so that I add them to my notes for Sunday.

To Tersie. Yes, I'm a slacker.

First of all, despite rumors to the contrary my blog hasn't been broken. *grin*

I am simply the world's worst procrastinator.

Secondly, I would like to dedicate my next blog (and the message to follow on Sunday) to an amazing lady, who (I hope) hasn't given up on me posting about this one day.

Tersie, thank you for your patience and your prodding me to get this done.

Now... to the good stuff...