Monday, August 20, 2007

Meltdown

so yesterday I had a meltdown...

First things first... I don't melt down. I do not stress, I work well under pressure, I am a control freak (to the extent that it is possible in any given situation)... and even when any of the above isn't true I pretty much don't let it get to me.

Second things second.... Obviously this is all hogwash (link provided for all of you not up on your redneck terminology). To the best of my knowledge everyone has stress. Most people worry about at least one thing, and some people worry about everything. The trick to not melting down, is that people find things to do with the stress... Some people run, some people fish, or take pictures, or punch things, or cry, or drink, or fly kites, or take walks, or go on a silent retreat, or something...

and then some people just bottle things up inside, they supress the urge to let it out, thinking that it will show weakness, or character flaws, or that someone might call them a pansy, or some other reason... and then, eventually there is no where left to store it all up, and they meltdown.

I'm one of those people.

Typically I can detect when a meltdown is approaching and take some action to hold it off, or find a way to release some of the pent-up stress so that the meltdown is less painful, and less draining. I do one of those things I mentioned above (walk,fish, getaway,etc) and things go back to bearable, and life goes on...

I won't bore you with the details of what's going on, or what got me to the general state of stress I was in on Sunday morning because it would... well... bore you.

But anyhoo.... Sunday morning, in the midst of amazing worship ( thanks Marty & gang ) and an equally amazing message from Steven, I melted. I hope that I melted quietly. I am allowing myself to believe that only one other person noticed, because then I'll be less worried about the fact that I melted in public.

The meltdown, thankfully, was short and was followed by an awesome afternoon ( see here and here and here ) with the RVCC Youth out at Chris & Tesa's place. What an amazing group of kids ( and adults ). What an awesome blessing to be part of this exciting ministry.

But anyhoo... That was yesterday, and now I am back to real life where melting down is not permitted.

Ah well....

4 comments:

julie p said...

Are you saying the Holy Spirit snuck up and grabbed you from behind? Gotta watch that guy!...lol

lauren. said...

i hope you know that you are not a pansy! =)

Sarah said...

Everyone needs to have a meltdown...it's human! As I tell everyone around me..."find your center" lol! Don't ask what it means it's up to your interpretation!

T5Guy said...

Eli said pansy...lol